Having Spiritual Conversations: Three Keys to Transformative Gospel Discussions
A message on engaging meaningfully with those who don't yet believe in Jesus
Picture two flower beds side by side. One appears barren and untouched, while the other looks identical but holds a secret—seeds have been carefully planted beneath the surface. To the casual observer, both beds look the same. But faith tells us something different is happening in the second bed. Soon, that same bed will burst into glorious bloom, revealing the fruit of patient, faithful sowing.
This image captures the heart of what it means to have spiritual conversations with people who don't yet believe in Jesus. We are called to be faithful sowers, planting seeds of kingdom truth in every aspect of our lives, trusting that God will bring the growth in His perfect timing.
I was reminded of this truth recently when my daughter Amarin and I ran the Peachtree Road Race—the largest 10K in the world with 52,000 runners streaming down Peachtree Road from Lenox to Piedmont Park. What struck me wasn't just the humbling realization that my 14-year-old cross-country runner was in much better shape than her dad (something I'm definitely going to change!), but the incredible cross-section of our city represented in that race.
Every kind of person you could imagine was there—including someone passionate enough to dress as "Fit Santa" in July heat, complete with white beard and running spandex. The opening prayer itself reflected Atlanta's diversity: "Amen. Shalom. Namaste. Hey, y'all." If that's not a picture of our city, I don't know what is.
Rather than withdrawing into our Christian bubble, we're called to engage this beautifully diverse world around us as agents of transformation. We have clarity and truth wrapped in love—and that combination can change everything.
1. We Are Called to Sow and Nurture Seeds of Truth
In Luke 8:5, Jesus shares the parable of the sower, where "the sower went out to sow seed." While this parable teaches us about different types of soil representing people's hearts, today I want you to focus simply on the seed that is in your hand. The words of the kingdom, the truths of God's love and grace, are like seeds waiting to be planted.
Focus on the seeds in your hand, not the condition of other people's soil. Jesus doesn't call us to be inspectors of soil—He calls us to be sowers of seed. And here's the beautiful truth: you have plenty of seed to sow.
Many of us feel disqualified, thinking, "I don't know enough to answer whatever questions might come up." But seed isn't the knowledge you've learned in a textbook—it's what you've acquired through your lived experience with God. What truth is being applied in your life that's making a change? That story, that testimony, that simple act of faithfulness—that's seed you can sow.
This happens in surprisingly simple ways. Since planting our church, we've made it a practice to ask people a straightforward question: "What can I be praying for you this week?" This genuine desire to be a praying community creates natural opportunities to sow gospel truth into someone's life.
I experienced this recently when our guys' group went to breakfast at a local restaurant. Our waitress mentioned she couldn't go to church because she had to work Sundays. I told her about our livestream and gave her a copy of our "Conversations" book, treating her well and leaving a good tip—because that's what we do as Christians.
What amazed me was her co-worker immediately asked, "Can I have one of those books too?" She said the waitress was in a season where she needed it, and they'd been talking about it. This was the third time I'd given a book to a server and someone nearby also asked for a copy. People are hungrier for life transformation than we realize.
Paul understood this partnership principle. In 1 Corinthians 3:6-7, he writes, "I planted the seed, Apollos watered it, but God has been making it grow." There's a beautiful collaboration here—we plant, others water, but God brings the growth. Jesus Himself spoke of this mystery in Mark 4:26-29, saying "the seed sprouts and grows, though the farmer does not know how."
The manner of our sowing matters deeply. Colossians 4:6 instructs us to "let our conversations always be full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that we may know how to answer everyone." Have you ever tried to eat unseasoned meat cooked in a hurry? It's unappetizing and hard to swallow. But properly seasoned food draws us in, makes us want more. Our spiritual conversations should be the same—full of grace and seasoned with the salt that makes people hungry for more of God.
2. We Sow in Love
What actually causes our spiritual sowing to be fruitful? It's love. First Corinthians 13:1 makes this crystal clear: "If I speak in the tongues of men and angels, but do not have love, I am a resounding gong."
Words without love are like harsh, clanging cymbals—noise that people want to escape rather than engage. I've seen this countless times, even during our Peachtree Road Race when hellfire-and-brimstone preachers were shouting "Turn, repent, turn from your sin!" I'm a Christian, and even I didn't want to hear that. Though it was truth, it wasn't spoken in love, making it just a "banging gong"—ineffective at best, toxic at worst.
Many of us have questioned our faith not because of unbelievers, but because of Christians who didn't demonstrate true love. I personally walked away from my faith as a teenager not because of worldly temptation, but because of a painful church split where people who claimed to know God's love didn't show it to one another during conflict.
But when we speak truth wrapped in genuine love, something beautiful happens. Ephesians 4:15 tells us that "speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head." Love doesn't shy away from clarity—because clarity is actually kindness. We get to embody what Jesus did, becoming the very Word of God to people in flesh and blood.
John 1:14 says, "The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us, full of grace and truth." Jesus's manner of life was magnetic. Luke 15 tells us that "the sinners and the tax collectors drew near to him." His love made people want to be close to Him.
People will more often remember how you make them feel rather than what you say. When you have a spiritual conversation with someone, do they feel seen and heard? Remember: God gave you two ears and one mouth so you can listen twice as much as you speak. Often, sowing seed can be as much about taking time to listen to a person's difficulty or pain rather than being quick to share a memory verse.
First Peter 3:15 gives us the perfect balance: we defend our faith and challenge people's thinking, but we do so "with gentleness and respect." This is what love looks like in spiritual conversations—we look for opportunities to plant seeds that will bear fruit as we water them with genuine care.
3. We Live as Faithful Witnesses
Our identity shapes everything about how we engage in spiritual conversations. We are people living formed lives on mission, being transformed into the image of Christ. And Jesus, in His eternal identity, was the faithful witness—not a prosecutor, not a judge, but a witness.
He testified to who the Father was through how He lived. If we embrace this same identity as faithful witnesses, our lives will speak and amplify the words we speak, giving people the gift of something authentic.
There's a famous quote often attributed to Saint Francis of Assisi: "I often preach the gospel and I sometimes use words." While some use this as an excuse to avoid actually speaking about faith, the truth is that when we both speak truth and demonstrate it with our lives, these two things reinforce one another powerfully.
First Peter 2:9 declares that we "declare the praises of him who called us out of darkness into his wonderful light." When we tell our stories—however simple they may seem—of what Jesus has done for us, we become powerful witnesses. Share about places where He's helped you gain victory over sin, areas where you've grown in the fruit of the Spirit, or specific ways He's answered prayer.
The disciples in Acts 4:20 said, "We cannot help but speak about what we have seen and heard." John echoes this in 1 John 1:1-3, describing how "what we have heard, what we have seen with our eyes, what we have looked at and our hands have touched—this we proclaim to you."
Here's a powerful truth: A person with theoretical knowledge is always at a disadvantage when confronted with a person with a transformational experience. John could say, "The person I'm telling you about—I've put my head to His chest and heard His heartbeat. I've seen Him resurrected." It was this lived reality that transformed cowards who ran from Jesus at the cross into courageous men and women who left the upper room at Pentecost and changed the world.
What have you experienced of God that has been so compelling, so transformational, that you can't help but tell others? That seed of testimony will bring transformation as it brings clarity and truth to all those you share it with.
Your Simple Recipe for Transformation
Here's your simple recipe for transforming the lives of those around you through spiritual conversations:
Sow and nurture seeds of truth in every natural opportunity. Ask people, "What can I pray for you this week?" When that waitress I mentioned shared she was moving and needed prayer, I gave her my email. I'll follow up to see how the move went, continuing to water that seed. Share how God has worked in your life. Plant kingdom truths wrapped in grace.
Do so in love. Let genuine care and respect season every conversation. Speak truth clearly but gently, making your faith attractive rather than abrasive. Listen twice as much as you speak. Remember that people will remember how you made them feel more than what you said.
Persevere as a faithful witness of Jesus through adversity, skepticism, and even ridicule. Love well, and trust that anointed conversations where you invite the Holy Spirit to work will transform people's lives.
Start today. Don't wait until later this week—stop someone today or tomorrow and ask that simple question: "How can I pray for you this week?" Send a text to someone you've been praying for. Give away a book that's impacted you. Cut someone's grass. Offer a cup of cold water in Jesus' name.
Remember those flower beds. Some may look barren now, but faithful sowing in love will yield a harvest of righteousness in due season. Trust the process, trust the God who brings growth, and keep planting seeds of His amazing grace.
As 2 Corinthians 5:20 reminds us, "We are therefore Christ's ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us." We represent God, appealing to people to be reconciled to Him because that is the yearning of God's heart.
Next week, we'll explore how to get more specific and clear about the truth of the gospel message in our conversations.
